The Most Important Ingredient Of Public Speaking
Did you know that many surveys indicate that people are more afraid of public speaking than dying?
That might be true, but as a life coach I know that we all have much greater potential than we are aware of and in my opinion this fear is more related to the unknown than to public speaking.
Doing something for the first time is always uncomfortable. Because whenever we want to do something new, we must be willing to step out of our comfort zone. And public speaking is no different.
Therefore, I feel confident to say that anyone can become a public speaker, if desire and the will are there.
As any other skills, public speaking skills are developed through learning and practice. There are many workshops and clubs where we can get valuable lessons, from how to choose a topic and write a speech to how to connect with the audience and successfully deliver our speech.
So, like with anything else in life, there is a recipe to becoming a successful public speaker and anyone who is willing to apply the recipe, can and will achieve outstanding results.
Still, it seems that only a few really mange to stand out and write their name I a book of greatness.
And whether you can believe it or not, I can confidently say that the next great one could be you.
Because there is one ingredient that many of us seem to struggle with the most, and that is to be ourselves. To stand in front of our audience and feel free to express our true self. To be who we really are.
At this point you could quite rightly be thinking that what I’m saying is ridiculous. That, of course you are yourself. Who else would you be?
But let me ask you something.
Are you confident enough to speak up in every situation without any fear of being judged and misunderstood? Do you ever worry about what people might be thinking about you and whether they like you or not? Do you ever bite your tongue as you believe that it would be better if you kept your opinion for yourself? Do you believe that there is an acceptable way of being, even if it doesn’t feel right?
I know I am guilty.
We live in a fast moving and very demanding world and from an early age most of us are being shaped into the next obedient citizen of this noisy society. The society that never stops sending us messages with instruction. What to eat, what to watch, what to wear, what is the next cool thing, what is in, what is out….The list goes on.
We go to school to be educated but after fifteen, twenty or more years we come out of school, very often without a clue, who we really are.
We identify ourselves with our profession and social status. We bury our true nature, our great souls under all the rules, all expectations and even the knowledge that we acquired over the years, as we created this self-image that is only good enough to fit in.
The truth is, every single one of us carries inside this great, amazing, unique soul that is seeking to express itself and grow. But where do we even begin after being silenced so many times?
We start by switching off the noise and start listening to ourselves. We start by learning to look inside and challenge our beliefs. We start by realising our true values. We start by asking ourselves, what it is that I really, really, really want and by facing the truth about where we currently are. We start by realising that our lives are reflection of who we are inside and that the most important work that we’ll ever have to do is our personal development.
Because we were not born shy. We were not born insecure. We were not born concerned about what other people think about us and whether they like us or not. And we definitely didn’t have a problem when we were babies to scream and demand attention whenever we wanted something.
So why is expressing ourselves so challenging now?
It’s a leaned behaviour. We have been programmed to be good for the society and very often at the expense of our own wellbeing.
So what does it mean being yourself as a public speaker?
It means speaking from your heart. It means speaking your truth. It means believing in yourself and expressing your uniqueness without fear of rejection and without need of approval.
When you are yourself, your mind, body, emotions and spirit are in alignment and you are strong, creative, spontaneous and authentic.
When you express yourself just the way you are people will listen to you because you have something that everyone wants. Deep down inside, we all want to have the courage to express ourselves just the way we are. And by being yourself, you are giving others the permission to be themselves too.
When you are yourself people will connect with you as they will want to learn what you already know.
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